writing is a thing of great hate

Hi my name is Bruce, and I have sexdaily dyslexia. I wrote a long boring essay about that, which is hosted here and on Medium, and essentially it can be boiled down to this: I hate writing, because it's hard. And that is a shame because I am also a habitual liar. I like lies, and I like liars. My favorite people in the world are liars; like Charles Bukowski, Cormac Macarthy, Ayn Rand, Silvia Plaith, JRR Tolkin, Isaac Azimov, Gillian Flynn, and so on and so forth. You get the idea already, I'm sure.

The world is shaped by great lies. Who we are, what we eat, what we wear all emerge from the essential lie of life. And the authors, well they describe where we are, and were, and will be. Reality itself is forged by words and our life is a continuum of lies and deceits; known and accidental. That is what I believe.

I wish I could be a great liar, but that is unlikely. I am content to be a whisperer of little lies, and to pot them, and nurture, and graft them, and tend them right here. This is my little house of fibs that hosts my non-sense. Consider that; within you there is a spindle. and it is that which spins your yarn. not the story of you (no, no) the actual you. Your fabric gets made and adjusted daily and at some point it needs to be hung out. Well this website is my place to show that laundry. Warts and all.

Lies matter the most. A Lie will always be a lie, where a truth is fragile, and often the truth itself becomes a lie with the passing of time. This begs us to ask if it was ever true? In contrast a lie is always a lie. It is a true story. You might even argue that the truth is more decietful than a lie, sometimes.

A place of many mistakes

This website was created because I have been hiding my handicap from the world for decadades. Ever since I was a little boy I have been ashamed of the lies and strange thoughts and nasty places I dream to go. The dyslexia is not really an issue for me, I honestly do not give a fuck, but ... readers do. It is a sad fact that independant of your brilliance a reader will not forgive a spelling mistake, or some ill grammar. I have been hammered by word police over and over. Somepeople do not undertand the dyslexia is not cureable with a spelling check.

I get to write without spelling checks. No doubt you will not stay long :D The site is highly opinionated and often a contradictory dwelling of words, ideas, practices and expressions of umbrage. I keep the garden so because, to be quite frank, i do not mind being wrong or becoming wrong. The mind is plastic. Anyone who incapable of changing their mind has already died; that mind is in a jar full of formeldahide. If not beware!

I just don't feel complelled to update the contractions. Cancel myself for changing my perspective? Hmmm. Why? Those thoughts they are older symbolic versions of my self, no less true then than now. I like seeing the things I once believed, and observing how the state of thoughts decay. From the hot impulse to write them in a moment of passion to the luke warms indifference at an older day.

The canonical canon

Another function of this website is to host the original document, sounds dumb, but this is whats known as the canonical source. Sometimes when you publish to online platforms, like Medium they recommend it. They don't want to be targeted for content duplication, Google penalizes web sites that do that, and they do ... unless there is a canonical reference to the original document.

Being a bit precious about copyright and such I prefer platforms that let me host the original, here, and then provide the proof read, grammar checked, edited, prettier, bitmap embelished version of the same corpus on their ad infested website. Es lo que hay. (It is the way it is).

Technical stuff ...

I am, like so many others, besotted with the trend towards static HTML sites again. The whole JAMstack nomelecure is a marketing hotair balloon, but I must say that for once I like it. I like static sites, and I like this trend. Even though I am a JS developer by trade the reliance on JS for basic site structyre is a bit sickly to me.

My website is written in markdown, rendered by Eleventy (an ugnostic JavaScript static site generator) and hosted on Netlify. The images are all served by the ImageKit CDN with two exceptions. On the homepage the sketches are randomly selected, that happens by setting the image src to use an API endpoint, or (catch phrase) an edge function.

This website does not rely on JavaScript at all. That is not to say there is no JS, because there is. On selected fiction pages I have hooked up the browsers native voice synthesiser, as a lame implimentation of an Audiobook type narrator.

My IDE of choice is Neovim and my operating system of choise is Manjaro the idiots distribution of Arch. I use that on my Laptop and desktop and on my ChromeOS (Google Pixelbook) I use an Ubuntu distro on a container shell.